Phil's Story Disordered Eating





Hi,

I started up as a kind of chubby kid, entering first grade and being teased about my weight in conjunction with my foreign name. To make myself feel better, I ate more and more, which of course did not help the situation any. In conjunction, my whole family made points and puns about my weight problem, reinforcing the 'fat' concept.

Change of scenery. At Twelve years of age I move into the United States and enter middle school speaking next to no English and being a good forty pounds overweight. The teasing (which had pretty much stopped at my old school) picked up again and turned worse than ever. I even projected the xenaphobic teasing onto my weight.

Change of scenery again. Upon turning fifteen I start riding my mountain bike more and more and lose the weight through this and football. Upon arriving at a 'healthy weight' I want to lose more. The sounds of fatty still echo in my head, and my thighs and lower arms seem flabby as ever. I stop eating, and take my families concerns as compliments. I also start dating, and out of the five girls I seriously dated, three had eating disorders: One was hospitalized for bulimia, one is still bulimic as far as I know and the third has a non-specific eating disorder. I personally have the disorder under a sort of control, I eat normally... but I can still feel and see myself getting fatter with every bite.

Thanks for an inspiring site,
Phil