Jodi's Story Bulimia Nervosa

Hi. My name is Jodi and I am a new bulimic. I think it is great that I can eat what I want and throw it all back up and lose weight. In high school I was always chunky. It got worse as I moved on to college. I am constantly comparing myself to other girls, telling myself that it doesn't matter that I am fat because I have a pretty face, but I never really believe that. I was very athletic in high school and continued to be in college, but I was still overweight. I am trying this again because I have to get into a bathing suit in front of everyone in about a month so I need to be thin. I never knew I had an eating disorder until I learned that even obsessing about weight is one. I am always looking into the mirror thinking how fat I am and how great I am going to look if I keep this up. I just hope it works. I think I started this because my family life is horrible. My parents tell me they hate me, and so does my little sister. I am too embarrassed to tell anyone about throwing up so I thought this would be a good way to get it out into the open. I don't know what else to do. I love to eat, so bulimia is the only way out for me. I know it sounds sad, but when I'm at work or school I actually look forward to going home so I can eat and throw up. I don't even really eat a lot when I throw up. But I do it after every time I eat. I hope I can stop when I get thin. Who knows for now. Until then I guess I will keep doing this to make me feel better about myself. I am glad that I am not alone in this. Thanks for you Website. It gives me something to turn to.