Kris' Story Anorexia & Bulimia

I don't know exactly what I m doing emailing u at this point but I guess in some way I'm looking for an answer to a question I don't even fully understand myself. I was reading some of the stories told by these girls with eating disorders along the line of bulimia/anorexia, which I guess relates to me. I read the signs and symptoms, which I already new I had, and took a quiz were if u answered yes to at least three u should seek help and out of 23 I answered yes to 16.

I guess I m just wondering what, if any, advise u can give me. I've had an eating disorder since I was a sophomore in high school and I just graduated. I thought I was over this whole thing but then my senior year seemed to go down hill and it has just continued from then to the present. Its not like I even want help and in fact I feel I need to lose more weight since at one point I was 5'4 and 98 lbs. and now I'm like up to 115 and I'm 18!!

I just look into the mirror and see nothing but fat rolls. I just recently started talking to some of my friends about it and told my boy friend which almost caused us to brake up cuz I told him I didn't want his help but we discussed it and he does want me to get help. I just don't want my parents to find out cuz at one point they wanted me to see a doc cuz they didn't know why I was getting so thin but I wouldn't go! Anyway, of course their is much more but I don't even know if I'll hear back from u. However any advise or answers u can give me would be greatly appreciated. Thank you